My Big Fat Greek Wedding

What key concepts go into a rom-com? We’ve all seen the classics; The Wedding Singer, 10 Things I Hate About You, She’s the Man. What do all of these movies have in common? Aside from the actors and actresses, pretty much everything. How many girl protagonists have a gay side kick, and how many men have a best friend supplying him with typically terrible advice? What about the flowers and constant sunshine with birds chirping? And a steamy make out session? Add some rain to that scene and its game over. It’s all there, we’ve all seen it. But it works, doesn’t it? One way or another we find ourselves hooked. Why is that? Could the answer simply be that, deep down, we all want the same intensity and passion in our own love lives? No way the answer can be that simple…

All of the classic cliché moments we gag a little bit to can be seen throughout My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002). We gag at how cheesy they are, yes. But you’d be lying if you said you don’t secretly think it’s all adorable. The movie starts off in typical rom-com fashion. The lead female role, Toula, grows from being a nerdy outcast little girl into an awkward outcast adult. Wearing thick framed glasses and frumpy clothes, Toula works as a hostess in her family’s Greek restaurant. After coincidentally running into Ian Miller several times, the two begin dating and quickly fall in love. While the couple can’t seem to stay away from each other, they face many challenges surrounding the differences in cultures. Though Ian comes from a non-religious, conservative, quiet, and small family, Toula comes from quite the opposite. Her family is large, loud, and in your face. Despite Ian’s many efforts, Toula’s father is incredibly hesitant in accepting him into their Greek family. Love conquers all, and viewers see this by the end of the film. Regardless of the cultural barriers Ian and Toula face, the couple presses onward to get their happy ending; marriage and merger of families. Get this. Her father gives the happy couple a house as a wedding gift at the end of the movie. A freakin’ house. Yeah, sure, makes sense. And, to make the ending even better, Ian and Toula have an adorable little girl and live right next door to all of Toula’s relatives. Yay for family and happy endings!

We’ve all seen movies where the shy and nerdy band geek is noticed by the quarterback of the football team, right? Yeah, cause’ high school boys have the mental capacity at that age to look under the skin of females around them. Mhmm, sure. Ian isn’t a quartback, and Toula doesn’t play in a marching band, but the same storyline is applied here. Toula proves to be awkward and somewhat shy, but Ian sees right through those characteristics and expresses his interest in her way before she changes her physical appearance. She isn’t the traditional pretty girl we typically see in romance movies, but Ian loves her regardless of her quirks. From the initial meeting in the Greek restaurant when Toula serves Ian she is completely love struck. What else can you do in a situation like that but stop and stare for an uncomfortable amount of time? And to make it better, duck behind the counter and pretend not to be seen. That’ll make it better, right? It worked for Toula. Before having a real conversation, the couple exchange awkward and funny looks. It’s clear from the beginning that they are drawn to each other. What’s that? Love at first site? I believe it is. But wait, it gets better. When he finally approaches her to have a conversation, guess what happens. She trips and falls face first on the ground only to be met by a charming smile from Ian. A clumsy girl attracts a smart, kind, and charming man? Shocking. After one conversation, Ian asks Toula on a date. It can’t really be that easy, can it?

After dinner, the lovely couple find themselves taking a nice little stroll on a dock by the water underneath the night sky and sparkling lights. He tells her she’s beautiful, and BAM, they kiss. It isn’t just a peck on the lips either. You bet your ass it was full of passion and intensity. Do you even have to ask? Obviously, there was soft piano playing in the background to set the mood. It doesn’t stop there though. A make out session? Duh. After the date is over and Ian drives her home, they sit in his car and have a steamy make out session. The honeymoon phase is initiated from there, and the couple can’t keep their hands off one another, ultimately leading to an engagement. We can make fun of the predictability of movies like this all we want, but at the end of the day, none of us would really mind if life actually happened like this. As corny as these concepts are, they’re experiences we all wish to have whether we want to admit it or not. It’s a normal human desire to want to be loved entirely and selflessly by another individual. Maybe we don’t all need our significant other to learn Greek and get baptized to make a marriage work, but we all want someone who will go the extra mile for us and see us for who we really are. Love is human nature, it’s a necessity. And that fact alone is what makes us incapable of holding a smile back during these oh so cheesy scenes.

We’ve all seen the montage of the pre-date makeover hundreds of times. The nerdy girl takes off her glasses, gets plucked and prodded at by a beauty team, throws at least ten outfits on the floor of her bedroom before finding the perfect choice, and is revealed to be a new and improved version of herself. Viewers get to see this transformation happen in this film, but in a more powerful way. While female characters typically run around like chickens with their heads cut off looking for the best way to impress their crush, Toula’s transformation is entirely self-motivated. Before even being introduced to Ian, Toula chooses to leave her glasses and baggy clothing behind and transforms into a new woman after being granted the opportunity to attend classes. She proves to be an independent woman and chooses to take her life into her own hands. She never considers changing her appearance for a man, she simply chooses to do so for her own happiness. You go girl!

While much of the film is focused on the traditional values individuals held regarding women and their domestic duties, Toula does everything in her power to defy these constraints without disrupting the order of her big happy family. At the beginning of the movie, her father expresses the desire he has to see his daughter marry and start her own family. Being as he is the head of the household, what Mr. Portokalos wants, he gets. Or so individuals would traditionally believe. Toula’s mother and aunt make a point to use their combined wit to outsmart Mr. Portokalos, and eventually gain his approval for Toula to attend school and pursue her dreams. While these women are aware of the fact that the female’s traditional role would be to obey man’s orders, they are also aware of the power they have to outsmart men when needed. With conjoined efforts, they find a way to keep Mr. Portokalo happy while supporting the independence Toula strives for. It can also be seen throughout other parts of the film that while the female figures in Toula’s life obey and respect the word of their male counterparts, they remain vocal in their opinions and desires. During one discussion between Toula and her mother, her mother says, “the man may be the head of the household, but the woman is the neck, and she can turn the head whichever way she pleases.” While the female characters in this film appear to be inferior to men, they are fully aware of what they’re capable of.

My Big Fat Greek Wedding has everything any viewer would enjoy; steamy make out sessions, grand gestures of love, family, quick witted humor from sneaky relatives, and awkward interactions that make you belly laugh. And for you females that enjoy seeing a woman take control of her life and find love after accepting her own quirks and oddball qualities, yup, that’s there too. Yeah, I get it, its all super corny. But what would life be without love, acceptance, support, comedy, and a little bit of passion?